LAUGH with DORAZ….The Brain*

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A LESSON FROM PINKY AND THE BRAIN…..CUTE ONE*

Psychology Class

A college psychology class was studing human reaction to sexual stimulus and of special interest was the frequency of amorous relations.

”How many students here,” said the professor, ”engage more than once a week?”

Five people raised their hands.

”And how many engage once a week?”

Ten hands went up.

”How many twice a month?”

Eight hands went up.

”Once a month?”

Four hands were raised.

”And how may once a year?”

A little guy in the back waved his hand frantically and giggled hysterically.

”If you engage only once a year,” said the professor, ”I don’t see what you’re so overjoyed about.”

Flush with excitement, the little guy said, ”Yeah, but tonight’s the night!”

READY FOR SCHOOL?…..Curious George is*

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BE GOOD. HAVE FUN. BE NICE TO YOUR TEACHER. HAVE A SUPER SCHOOL YEAR LEARNING! YOU CAN DO IT!

” A f r i c a n Elephant “

From the diary of a Pre-School Teacher

My five-year old students are learning to read.

Yesterday one of them pointed at a picture in a zoo book and said,

“Look at this! It’s a frickin’ elephant!”

I took a deep breath, then asked… “What did you call it?”

“It’s a frickin’ elephant! It says so on the picture!”

And so it does…

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” A f r i c a n Elephant “

Hooked on phonics! Isn’t it wonderful?

BACK TO SCHOOL JOKES……

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A friend sent me these. I thought they were cute. Enjoy!!!
From the mouth of babes:

TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America.
*MARIA:** Here it is.
* TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America?
CLASS: ** Maria.
* ____________________________________

*TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication
on the floor?**
JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.
__________________________________________*

TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell ‘crocodile?’
GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L’
TEACHER: No, that’s wrong
*GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I
spell it.
____________________________________________*

TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD: H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
*DONALD: Yesterday you said it’s H to O.
__________________________________*

TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today
that we didn’t have
ten years ago.
WINNIE: Me!
__________________________________________

TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?
*GLEN: **Well, I’m a lot closer to the ground
than you are.
**_______________________________________*

TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with
‘I.’
MILLIE: I is..
TEACHER: No, Millie….. Always say, ‘I am.’
*MILLIE: All right…. ‘I am the ninth letter
of the alphabet.’
*
*_________________________________*

*TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his
father’s **cherry tree,
but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his
father didn’t punish
him?
LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand.
* ______________________________________

TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers
before eating?
*SIMON: **No sir, I don’t have to, my Mom is a
good cook.
* ______________________________

TEACHER: Clyde , your composition on ‘My Dog’ is
exactly the same as your
brother’s. Did you copy his?
*CLYDE : **No, sir. It’s the same dog.**
___________________________________

TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on
talking when
people are no longer interested?
*HAROLD: A teacher**

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