Lot’s more Jokes …….AND amazing fruit objects……you’ll like these!

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Thanks to my good friend Deb for sharing these!

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Rejected card greetings………

“Thanks for being a part of my life!!!…
— I never knew what evil was before this!”

“Before you go,…
I would like you to take this knife out of my back.
— You’ll probably need it again.”

“Someday I hope to get married…
— but not to you.”

“You look great for your age…
— Almost Lifelike!”

“When we were together, you always said you’d die for me…
— Now that we’ve broken up, I think it’s time you kept your promise.”

“I knew the day would come when you would leave me for my best friend…
— So here’s his leash, water bowl and chew toys.”

“We have been friends for a very long time…
— What do you say we call it quits?”

“I’m so miserable without you…
— It’s almost like you’re here.”

Live Well – Laugh Often – Love Much …..

Please do not forget your flu shot!!!!The First Half of this makes sense, but I like the second half better.

Make sure you get your daily dose of

fruits and veggies.

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Take your vitamins and bump up your vitamin C.

Get plenty of exercise because exercise helps build your immune system.Walk for at least an hour a day,go for a swim,take the stairs instead of the elevator, etc.

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Wash your hands often.
If you can’t wash them,
keep a bottle of antibacterial stuff around.
Get lots of fresh air.

Image Open doors & windows whenever possible.

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Try to eliminate as much stress
from your life as you can.

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Get plenty of rest.

OR ………..You can take the doctor’s approach to getting a flu shot……….
Think about it…
When you go for a shot,
what do they do first?
They Clean your arm with alcohol …
Why?
Because Alcohol KILLS GERMS.
So…….

I walk to the liquor store. (exercise)
I put lime in my Corona …(fruit)
Celery in my Bloody Mary (veggies)
Drink outdoors on the bar patio..(fresh air)
Tell jokes, laugh….(eliminate stress)
Then pass out. (rest)
The way I see it…

If you keep your alcohol levels up,
flu germs can’t get you!
I</p> <p>My  mother always said,<br /> 'A shot in the glass<br /> is better than  one in the ass!'<br /> <img src=
My mother always said,
‘A shot in the glass
is better than one in the ass!’

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