Ear Infection…………Right??? *(*

This is so true! They always ask at the doctor’s office why you are there, and you have to answer in front of others what’s wrong — and sometimes it is embarrassing.

There’s nothing worse than a doctor’s receptionist who insists you tell her what is wrong with you in a room full of other patients. I know most of us have experienced this, and I love the way this old guy handled it:

A 65-year-old man walked into a crowded waiting room and approached the desk.

The receptionist said, “Yes, sir, what are you seeing the doctor for today?”

He replied, “There’s something wrong with my pecker.”

The receptionist became irritated and said, “You shouldn’t come into a crowded waiting room and say things like that.”

“Why not? You asked me what was wrong, and I told you.”

The receptionist replied, “Now you’ve caused some embarrassment in this room full of people. You should have said there is something wrong with your ear and then discussed the problem further with the doctor in private.”

“You shouldn’t ask people questions in a room full of strangers if the answer could embarrass anyone,” the man said. Then he walked out and waited several minutes before re-entering.

The receptionist smiled smugly and said, “Yes?”

“There’s something wrong with my ear.”

The receptionist nodded approvingly and smiled, knowing he had taken her advice. “And what is wrong with your ear, sir?”

“I can’t piss out of it.”

The waiting room erupted in laughter.

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The lesson: Mess with seniors, and you’re going to lose!

Thanks Kristi!!!

Smile of the Day………-)*

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An older couple is lying in bed one morning.

They had just awakened from a good night’s sleep.

He takes her hand and she responds, ‘Don’t touch me.’

‘Why not?’ he asked.

She answered, ‘Because I’m dead.’

The husband asked…’What are you talking about? We’re both lying here in bed together and talking to one another!’

She said, ‘No, I’m definitely dead.’

He insisted, ‘You are not dead. What in the world makes you think you’re dead?’

‘Because I woke up this morning and nothing hurts.’

Thanks Kristi!

See what they say……..interesting

Sometimes, when I look at my children, I say to myself ~~’Lillian, you should have remained a virgin.’
— Lillian Carter (mother of Jimmy & Billy Carter)

The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending; and to have the two as close together as possible.
— George Burns

Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people only once a year.
– – Victor Borge

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.
— Mark Twain

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar and fat.
Alex Levine

I don’t feel old. I don’t feel anything until noon.
Then it’s time for my nap.
— Bob Hope

I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.
— W.C. Fields

We could certainly slow the aging process down if it had to work its way through Congress.
— Will Rogers

Don’t worry about avoiding temptation as you grow older, it will avoid you
— Winston Churchill

Maybe it’s true that life begins at fifty, but everything else starts to wear out, fall out, or spread out.
— Phyllis Diller

B y the time a man is wise enough to watch his step, he’s too old to go anywhere
— Billy Crystal

The cardiologist’s diet: If it tastes good, spit it out.

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JOKE….The Church Organist, Miss Beatrice…….

Miss Beatrice, The church organist, was in her eighties and had never been married. She was admired for her sweetness and kindness to all.

One afternoon the pastor
came to call on her and she showed him into her quaint sitting room.

She invited him to have a seat while she prepared tea.

As he sat facing her old Hammond organ, the young minister noticed a cute glass bowl Sitting on top of it.

The bowl was filled with water, and in the water floated, of all things, a condom!

When she returned with tea and scones, they began to chat.

The pastor tried to stifle his curiosity about the bowl of water and its strange floater, but soon it got the better of him and he could no longer resist.

‘Miss Beatrice’, he said, ‘I wonder if you would tell me about this?’ Pointing to the bowl.

‘Oh, yes,’ she replied, ‘Isn’t it wonderful?

I was walking through the Park one day and I found this little package on the ground.

The directions said to place it on the organ, keep it wet and that it would prevent the spread of disease. Do you know I haven’t ever  had the flu since I found this!’
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Cute Cartoon Humor……Is this you?

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Here’s a JOKE you haven’t heard!

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