Friends in Life……LAUGH with DORAZ*

Thought for the day:

Women are angels. And when someone breaks our wings,

we simply continue to fly…on a broomstick.

We are flexible like that.

A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day…

30,000 to a man’s 15,000.

The wife replied, ‘The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything to men…..

The husband then turned to his wife and asked, ‘What?’

*
*
*

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE…
One friend who
Always makes her Laugh…
And one
Who lets her cry…

*
*
HOW OFTEN DO YOU GET TO SPEND TIME WITH YOUR “LONGTIME” FRIENDS?
*
*
CONTRIBUTED by:KRISTI KEYPERS

TECHNOLOGY…LAUGH with DORAZ*

This will explain why “Old-timers” have so much trouble with computers.

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

Thanks KRISTI KEYPERS

YOU DID WHAT?

>
WHAT WAS THE STRANGEST DREAM YOU HAD, AND WHY DO YOU THINK YOU HAD IT?

READY FOR SCHOOL?…..Curious George is*

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

BE GOOD. HAVE FUN. BE NICE TO YOUR TEACHER. HAVE A SUPER SCHOOL YEAR LEARNING! YOU CAN DO IT!

Just Thought I’d Ask You This Question…4/17*

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

How do you feel about people talking to you when you are in the bathroom “trying to do…your thing?” Emergency situations do not apply.

INSTALLING A HUSBAND………….*)*.

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

Dear Tech Support:

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to
Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slow down in
overall system performance, particularly in the
flower and jewelry applications, which operated
flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0 ..

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other
valuable programs, such as: Romance 9.5 and
Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed
undesirable programs such as:

· NBA 5.0
· NFL 3.0 · Golf Clubs 4.1

Also Conversation 8. 0 no longer runs, and
Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system.

– Please note that I have tried running
Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.

What can I do?

Signed,
Desperate

Dear Desperate;

First, keep in mind,
· Boyfriend 5..0 is an Entertainment Package, while
· Husband 1.0 is an operating system.

Please enter command: ithoughtyoulovedme.html
and try to download Tears 6.2 and do not forget to
install the Guilt 3.0 update.

If that application works as designed,
Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the
applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.

However, remember, overuse of the above
application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to
Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1.

*** Please note that Beer 6. 1 is a very bad
program that will download the Farting and
Snoring Loudly Beta.

Whatever you do, DO NOT under any
circumstances install Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs a
virus in the background that will eventually seize control
of all your system resources).

In addition, please do not attempt to reinstall the
Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported
applications and will crash Husband 1.0.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program;
but it does have limited memory and cannot learn
new applications quickly. You might consider
buying additional software to improve memory
and performance. We recommend:

· Cooking 3.0
· Hot Lingerie 7.7

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

Good Luck!
Tech Support

Love it Kristi, Thanks!

The Sack Lunches….a story

I put my carry-on in the luggage compartment and sat down in my assigned
seat. It was going to be a long flight. ‘I’m glad I have a good book to
read and perhaps I will get a short nap,’ I thought.

Just before take-off, a line of soldiers came down the aisle and filled all
the vacant seats, totally surrounding me. I decided to start a
conversation. ‘Where are you headed?’ I asked the soldier seated nearest to
me.

‘Petawawa. We’ll be there for two weeks for special training, and then we’re
being deployed to Afghanistan.’

After flying for about an hour, an announcement was made that sack lunches
were available for five dollars. It would be several hours before we
reached the east, and I quickly decided a lunch would help pass the time.

As I reached for my wallet, I overheard soldier ask his buddy if he planned
to buy lunch. ‘No, that seems like a lot of money for just a sack lunch.
Probably wouldn’t be worth five bucks. I’ll wait till we get to base ‘

His friend agreed.

I looked around at the other soldiers. None were buying lunch. I walked to
the back of the plane and handed the flight attendant a fifty dollar bill.
‘Take a lunch to all those soldiers.’ She grabbed my arms and squeezed
tightly. Her eyes wet with tears, she thanked me. ‘My son was a soldier in
Iraq ; it’s almost like you are doing it for him.’

Picking up ten sacks, she headed up the aisle to where the soldiers were
seated. She stopped at my seat and asked, ‘Which do you like best – beef or
chicken?’

‘Chicken,’ I replied, wondering why she asked. She turned and went to the
front of plane, returning a minute later with a dinner plate from first
class. ‘This is yours with thanks.’

After we finished eating, I went again to the back of the plane, heading for
the rest room. A man stopped me. ‘I saw what you did. I want to be part
of it. Here, take this.’ He handed me twenty-five dollars.

Soon after I returned to my seat, I saw the Aircraft Pilot coming down the
aisle, looking at the aisle numbers as he walked, I hoped he was not looking
for me, but noticed he was looking at the numbers only on my side of the
plane. When he got to my row he stopped, smiled, held out his hand, an
said, ‘I want to shake your hand.’

Quickly unfastening my seatbelt I stood and took the Captain’s hand. With a
booming voice he said, ‘I was a soldier and I was a military pilot. Once,
someone bought me a lunch. It was an act of kindness I never forgot.’ I
was embarrassed when applause was heard from all of the passengers.

Later I walked to the front of the plane so I could stretch my legs. A man
who was seated about six rows in front of me reached out his hand, wanting
to shake mine. He left another twenty-five dollars in my palm.

When we landed I gathered my belongings and started to deplane. Waiting
just inside the airplane door was a man who stopped me, put something in my
shirt pocket, turned, and walked away without saying a word. Another
twenty-five dollars!

Upon entering the terminal, I saw the soldiers gathering for their trip to
the base. I walked over to them and handed them seventy-five dollars. ‘It
will take you some time to reach the base. It will be about time for a
sandwich. God Bless You.’

Ten young men left that flight feeling the love and respect of their fellow
travelers. As I walked briskly to my car, I whispered a prayer for their
safe return. These soldiers were giving their all for our country. I could
only give them a couple of meals. It seemed so little.

A veteran is someone who, at one point in his life, wrote a blank check made
payable to his country for an amount of ‘up to and including my life.’

That is Honor, and there are way too many people who no longer understand it.

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

Kristi, thank you for sharing this with us!

Just Thought I’d Ask You This Question……….3/3 *)*

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

If you could be a “BUG” on a wall, where would you want to be?

No Question is a Dumb Question, am I Right?…..*)*

I can just feel a bunch of you out there are just screaming at this question, right? Oh, was that a dumb question? No, I guess not since that is what this post is going to be about. It is on topic, right?
I guess if a question is on the topic that is being discussed, it is appropriate. Then that means, if the question is “way out there” and makes NO sense to ask…at that time….Is it a dumb question? Well, I would have to say YES! Let me explain, OK? If you are talking about the price of groceries and how you noticed that items are going up, and a friend you are with looks right at you and asks, “So, what is that guy doing over there?”…am I suppose to stop what I am discussing with someone and LOOK? Now, what did her question have to do with the price of food? Was she having “a moment” where she was just out in la la land???? I mean. wasn’t that a dumb question to ask, at that time? So, I do believe that no question is a dumb question….you are dumb if you do not ask it….BUT, I do believe it needs to be AT THE RIGHT TIME, and should “Go With The Flow” of a conversation. Oh well, just my opinion!

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

Believe in Yourself;

Luisa Doraz

Just Thought I’d Ask You This Question……….3/1 *)*

If you were out somewhere and saw someone being mugged, what would you do?

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us