The other half of my life…a poem*

Just thinking about the years when I begin to grow older and wiser,

I am a bit happy and a bit sad.

Will I be one that does not remember my family?

Will I be one who has trouble with every day tasks?

Or, perhaos I will be one

who runs miles till the end

with a smile of happiness and joy

For the world is a place that does offer those options

We have only to seek them and succeed

with our thoughts.

So, I decided I will continue to conquer

on with this life and

take what is thrown my way.

What other choice do I really have?

Believe in Yourself;

Luisa Doraz

Maxine Cartoons….PG-13*

Have a fun Friday!

What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
A widow.

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I think the only reason my husband likes to go fishing so much is that it’s the only time he hears someone tell him, “Wow, that’s a big one!”

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What’s the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
1) After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.
2) A dog only takes a couple of months to train.

NO WORDS NEEDED*…PHOTO

“I CAN’T BELIEVE SHE DOESN’T SEE THAT!”

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When it’s time to take a senior citizen’s license away!….VIDEO

CONTRIBUTED by:KRISTI KEYPERS

DEMENTIA QUIZ ….LAUGH with DORAZ*

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DEMENTIA QUIZ

FIRST QUESTION:

YOU ARE A PARTICIPANT IN A RACE. YOU OVERTAKE
THE SECOND PERSON. WHAT POSITION ARE YOU IN?
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ANSWER: IF YOU ANSWERED THAT YOU ARE FIRST,
THEN YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY WRONG! IF YOU OVERTAKE THE
SECOND PERSON AND YOU TAKE HIS PLACE, YOU ARE IN SECOND PLACE!

TRY TO DO BETTER NEXT TIME.
NOW ANSWER THE SECOND QUESTION,
BUT DON’T TAKE AS MUCH TIME AS
YOU TOOK FOR THE FIRST QUESTION, OK?

SECOND QUESTION:
IF YOU OVERTAKE THE LAST PERSON, THEN YOU ARE….?
(SCROLL DOWN)

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ANSWER: IF YOU ANSWERED THAT YOU ARE SECOND TO LAST, THEN YOU ARE…..
WRONG AGAIN. TELL ME SUNSHINE, HOW CAN YOU OVERTAKE THE LAST PERSON??
YOU’RE NOT VERY GOOD AT THIS, ARE YOU?

THIRD QUESTION:
VERY TRICKY ARITHMETIC! NOTE:
THIS MUST BE DONE IN YOUR HEAD ONLY.
DO NOT USE PAPER AND PENCIL OR A CALCULATOR.
TRY IT.

TAKE 1000 AND ADD 40 TO IT. NOW ADD ANOTHER 1000 NOW ADD 30.
ADD ANOTHER 1000. NOW ADD 20. NOW ADD ANOTHER 1000.
NOW ADD 10. WHAT IS THE TOTAL?

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DID YOU GET 5000?

THE CORRECT ANSWER IS ACTUALLY 4100…

IF YOU DON’T BELIEVE IT, CHECK IT WITH A CALCULATOR!
TODAY IS DEFINITELY NOT YOUR DAY, IS IT?

MAYBE YOU’LL GET THE LAST QUESTION RIGHT… MAYBE…

FOURTH QUESTION:

MARY’S FATHER HAS FIVE DAUGHTERS:

1. NANA, 2. NENE, 3. NINI, 4. NONO, AND ???

2. WHAT IS THE NAME OF THE FIFTH DAUGHTER?

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DID YOU ANSWER NUNU? NO! OF COURSE IT ISN’T.
HER NAME IS MARY! READ THE QUESTION AGAIN!

OKAY, NOW THE BONUS ROUND,
I.E., A FINAL CHANCE TO
REDEEM YOURSELF:

A MUTE PERSON GOES INTO A SHOP AND WANTS TO BUY A TOOTHBRUSH.
BY IMITATING THE ACTION OF BRUSHING HIS TEETH HE
SUCCESSFULLY EXPRESSES HIMSELF TO THE SHOPKEEPER AND THE PURCHASE IS DONE.
NEXT, A BLIND MAN COMES INTO THE SHOP WHO WANTS TO BUY A
PAIR OF SUNGLASSES; HOW DOES HE INDICATE WHAT HE WANTS?

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IT’S REALLY VERY SIMPLE
HE OPENS HIS MOUTH AND ASKS FOR IT…
DOES YOUR EMPLOYER ACTUALLY PAY YOU TO THINK??
IF SO DO NOT LET THEM SEE YOUR ANSWERS FOR THIS TEST!

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PASS THIS ON TO FRUSTRATE THE
SMART PEOPLE IN YOUR LIFE!
HAVE A NICE DAY, ONE AND ALL.

MY EVERYDAY EDUCATION*

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As I go out on my daily adventures, I am honored to meet many interesting people around town. They are interesting to me bacause they always seem to offer a different and bright perpective on things. Some of their beliefs and attitudes simply amaze me. I am fascinated with their homesty and zest for life. They seem to treat everything in their lives as a challenge they are priviledged to conquer. They feel priviledged becuase they are alive to tackle the hurdles that are made higher and higher each day for them! They just take it with a grain of salt, and keep plugging along. The people I refer to are the senior citizens of my town that I have the honor of knowing. I sure do appreciate them and I sure do appreciate them taking the time to explain about this crazy world we live in. You can have the same rewards. Just take a few minutes to stop and listen. That’s it. That is all they request!

Believe in Yourself;

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Luisa Doraz

SILLY SMILE FOR THE NIGHT…..

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Thanks to my old friend…Kristi *(*

SMILE…….. FOR A THURSDAY AFTERNOON*

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A little old lady was running up and
down the halls in a nursing home. As she walked, she would
flip up the hem of her nightgown and say ‘Supersex.’
She walked up to an elderly man in a wheelchair. Flipping
her gown at him, she said, ‘Supersex.’ He sat
silently for a moment or two and finally answered,
‘I’ll take the soup.’

Believe in Yourself;

Luisa Doraz

Tjamks Pam!

A Heartwarming Story you want to Read*

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The first day of school our professor introduced himself and challenged us to get to know someone we didn’t already know. I stood up to look around when a gentle hand touched my shoulder.

I turned around to find a wrinkled, little old lady beaming up at me with a smile that lit up her entire being.

She said, ‘Hi handsome. My name is Rose. I’m eighty-seven years old. Can I give you a hug?’

I laughed and enthusiastically responded, ‘Of course you may!’ and she gave me a giant squeeze.

‘Why are you in college at such a young, innocent age?’ I asked.

She jokingly replied, ‘I’m here to meet a rich husband, get married, and have a couple of kids…’

‘No seriously,’ I asked. I was curious what may have motivated her to be taking on this challenge at her age.

‘I always dreamed of having a college education and now I’m getting one!’ she told me.

After class we walked to the student union building and shared a chocolate milkshake.

We became instant friends. Every day for the next three months we would leave class together and talk nonstop. I was always mesmerized listening to this ‘time machine’ as she shared her wisdom and experience with me.

Over the course of the year, Rose became a campus icon and she easily made friends wherever she went. She loved to dress up and she revelled in the attention bestowed upon her from the other students. She was living it up.

At the end of the semester we invited Rose to speak at our football banquet. I’ll never forget what she taught us. She was introduced and stepped up to the podium. As she began to deliver her prepared speech, she dropped her three by five cards on the floor.

Frustrated and a little embarrassed she leaned into the microphone and simply said, ‘I’m sorry I’m so jittery. I gave up beer for Lent and this whiskey is killing me! I’ll never get my speech back in order so let me just tell you what I know..’

As we laughed she cleared her throat and began, ‘We do not stop playing because we are old; we grow old because we stop playing.

There are only four secrets to staying young, being happy and achieving success.. You have to laugh and find humour every day. You’ve got to have a dream. When you lose your dreams, you die.

We have so many people walking around who are dead and don’t even know it!

There is a huge difference between growing older and growing up.

If you are nineteen years old and lie in bed for one full year and don’t do one productive thing, you will turn twenty years old. If I am eighty-seven years old and stay in bed for a year and never do anything I will turn eighty-eight.

Anybody can grow older. That doesn’t take any talent or ability. The idea is to grow up by always finding opportunity in change. Have no regrets.

The elderly usually don’t have regrets for what we did, but rather for things we did not do. The only people who fear death are those with regrets.’

She concluded her speech by courageously singing ‘The Rose.’

She challenged each of us to study the lyrics and live them out in our daily lives. At the year’s end Rosefinished the college degree she had begun all those years ago.

One week after graduation Rose died peacefully in her sleep.

Over two thousand college students attended her funeral in tribute to the wonderful woman who taught by example that it’s never too late to be all you can possibly be.

When you finish reading this, please send this peaceful word of advice to your friends and family, they’ll really enjoy it!

These words have been passed along in loving memory of ROSE.

REMEMBER, GROWING OLDER IS MANDATORY. GROWING UP IS OPTIONAL. We make a Living by what we get; we make a Life by what we give.

God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage. If God brings you to it, He will bring you through it.

Thanks to Pam!

How to LOOK at your bank Account….and smile*

This is AWESOME … something we should all remember.
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A 92-year-old, petite, well-poised and proud man, who is fully dressed each morning by eight o’clock, with his hair fashionably combed and shaved perfectly, even though he is legally blind, moved to a nursing home today.
His wife of 70 years recently passed away, making the move necessary. After many hours of waiting patiently in the lobby of the nursing home, he smiled sweetly when told his room was ready.
As he maneuvered his walker to the elevator, I provided a visual description of his tiny room, including the eyelet sheets that had been hung on his window.
I love it,’ he stated with the enthusiasm of an eight-year-old having just been presented with a new puppy.
Mr. Jones, you haven’t seen the room; just wait.’
‘That doesn’t have anything to do with it,’ he replied.
Happiness is something you decide on ahead of time.
Whether I like my room or not doesn’t depend on how the furniture is arranged .. it’s how I arrange my mind. I already decided to love it.
‘It’s a decision I make every morning when I wake up. I have a choice;
I can spend the day in bed recounting the difficulty I have with the parts of my body that no longer work, or get out of bed and be thankful for the ones that do.
Each day is a gift, and as long as my eyes open, I’ll focus on the new day and all the happy memories I’ve stored away… Just for this time in my life.
Old age is like a bank account. You withdraw from what you’ve put in.
So, my advice to you would be to deposit a lot of happiness in the bank account of memories!
Thank you for your part in filling my Memory Bank.
I am still depositing.
‘Remember the five simple rules to be happy:
1. Free your heart from hatred.
2. Free your mind from worries.
3. Live simply.
4. Give more.
5. Expect less.

Thanks to Kristi!!!

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