Down to the wire…..

No, I am not stressed out. I am calm. I just have a lot of little errands to run before my friend gets married on June 8th. I am really excited for her. She is also getting little things done each day. All of this running around has made me realize a few things. Life is what you make it. You can make your daily chores seem terrible, or you can dance when you are doing them! I am sure the people around you do not care. You might even get them to smile! I have a tendency to dance in public. I seem to do a lot better when I hear the music instead of the ugliness that is going on around me. Call it denial if you want. I call it mental health management. Do you have a way to make yourself get calm about your daily chores? I would be real interested in hearing about them. Until the wedding, I will be blogging off and on. I hope you are all well and happy. I hope you are enjoying your free time and getting to do some of those things you have always wanted to do, but do not seem to have the time to do them. (I wanted to see how long I could make that last sentence! LOL)

Believe in Yourself;

Luisa Doraz

A First for ME

k2

k3>

Well, you have to believe me when I say that is actually me out there you see in the water. What am I doing? Well, my second son bought a KAYAK, with all of the gear. He insisted that I try it out! I could not leave until I did! I have to admit, I was a bit on the hesitant side. I would have rather had on my bathing suit instead of my new clothes I just got! I could see that my son REALLY wanted to see what would happen, so I did it! I am now hooked. I adjusted quickly to the balance issue. I got accustomed to getting wet! I sat in a puddle of water the whole time, put my pants finally dried! Once I got into the groove of kayaking, I did not want to stop! So, I guess I did learn that YOU CAN teach an old dog new tricks! lol Have fun!

Believe in Yourself;

Luisa Doraz

Health joke…PG-13 *

...  . A male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose. A young student nurse appears and gives him a partial sponge bath. "Nurse,"' he mumbles from behind the mask, "are my testicles black?" Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, "I don't know, Sir. I'm only here to wash your upper body and feet." He struggles to ask again, "Nurse, please check for me. Are my testicles black?" Concerned that he might elevate his blood pressure and heart rate from worrying about his testicles, she overcomes her embarrassment and pulls back the covers. She raises his gown, holds his manhood in one hand and his testicles gently in the other. She looks very closely and says, "There's nothing wrong with them, Sir. They look fine." The man slowly pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her, and says very slowly, "Thank you very much. That was wonderful. Now listen very, very closely: Are - my - test - results - back?"

Thanks to Beverly for sending me this…..

RETIRED HEALTH MESSAGE

As I was lying in bed pondering the problems of the world, I rapidly realized that I don’t really give a rat’s hiney. It’s the tortoise life for me!
1.. If walking is good for your health, the postman would be immortal.
2.. A whale swims all day, only eats fish, drinks water, and is fat.
3.. A rabbit runs and hops and only lives 15 years.
4.. A tortoise doesn’t run and does nothing, yet it lives for 450 years.
And you tell me to exercise?? I don’t think so.

I’m retired. Go around me.

God grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked, the good fortune to run into the ones I do, and the eyesight to tell the difference.

Now that I’m older here’s what I’ve discovered:
1. I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it.

2. My wild oats have turned into prunes and all-bran.

3. I finally got my head together, and now my body is falling apart.

4. Funny, I don’t remember being absent-minded.

5. Funny, I don’t remember being absent-minded.

6. If all is not lost, where is it?

7. It is easier to get older than it is to get wiser.

8. Some days, you’re the dog; some days you’re the hydrant.

9. I wish the buck stopped here; I sure could use a few.

10. Kids in the back seat cause accidents.

11. Accidents in the back seat cause kids.

12. It’s hard to make a comeback when you haven’t been anywhere.

13. The only time the world beats a path to your door is when you’re in the bathroom.

14. If God wanted me to touch my toes, he’d have put them on my knees.

15. When I’m finally holding all the cards, why does everyone want to play chess?

16. Its not hard to meet expenses . . . they’re everywhere.

17. The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.

18. These days, I spend a lot of time thinking about the hereafter . . .I go somewhere to get something, and then wonder what I’m hereafter

19. Funny, I don’t remember being absent-minded.

20. DID I SEND THESE TO YOU BEFORE……….??????

Have a fun week! Be sure to laugh and smile often.

Luisa Doraz

More Men……

Hope you are all well and happy. I sure am. My son who moved to Texas is back home. All is good. He will be starting a new job here. I am soooo happy! I hope you all find peace and happiness in your life. Be sure to vote. You matter!

Believe in Yourself;

Luisa Doraz

Born 1930 – 1979…….by Jay Leno*

You definitely need to read the statement by Jay. Oh so true.

Those of You Born
1930 – 1979

TO ALL THE KIDS WHO SURVIVED THE
1930′s, 40′s, 50′s, 60′s and 70′s!

First, we survived being born to mothers
Who smoked and/or drank while they were
Pregnant.

They took aspirin, ate blue cheese dressing,
Tuna from a can and didn’t get tested for diabetes.

Then after that trauma, we were put to sleep on our tummies in baby cribs covered with bright colored lead-base paints.
We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles,
Locks on doors or cabinets and when we rode
Our bikes, we had baseball caps not helmets on our heads.
As infants & children,
We would ride in cars with no car seats,
No booster seats, no seat belts, no air bags, bald tires and sometimes no brakes.
Riding in the back of a pick-up truck on a warm day
Was always a special treat.

We drank water
From the garden hose and not from a bottle.

We shared one soft drink with four friends,
From one bottle and no one actually died from this.

We ate cupcakes, white bread, real butter and bacon..
We drank Kool-Aid made with real white sugar.
And, we weren’t overweight.
WHY?

Because we were
Always outside playing…that’s why!

We would leave home in the morning and play all day,
As long as we were back when the
Streetlights came on.

No one was able
To reach us all day. And, we were O.K.

We would spend hours building our go-carts out of scraps
And then ride them down the hill, only to find out
We forgot the brakes. After running into the bushes
a few times, we learned to solve the problem.

We did not have Playstations, Nintendo’s and X-boxes.
There were no video games, no 150 channels on cable,
No video movies or DVD’s, no surround-sound or CD’s,
No cell phones, No personal computers, no Internet and no chat rooms.
WE HAD FRIENDS
And we went outside and found them!

We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth
And there were no lawsuits from these accidents.

We ate worms and mud pies made from dirt,
And the worms did not live in us
Forever.

We were given BB guns for our 10th birthdays,
Made up games with sticks and tennis balls and,
Although we were told it would happen,
We did not put out very many eyes.

We rode bikes or walked to a friend’s house and
Knocked on the door or rang the bell, or just
Walked in and talked to them.

Little League had tryouts and not everyone made the team.
Those who didn’t had to learn to deal
With disappointment.
Imagine that!!

The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke the law
Was unheard of.
They actually sided with the law!

These generations have produced some of the best
Risk-takers, problem solvers and inventors ever.

The past 50 years
Have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas.
We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility,
and we learned how to deal with it all.

If YOU are one of them?
CONGRATULATIONS!
You might want to share this with others
who have had the luck to grow up as kids, before the
lawyers and the government regulated so much of our lives
for our own good .

While you are at it, forward it to your kids so they will know
how brave and lucky their parents were.

Kind of makes you want to run through the house
with scissors, doesn’t it ?

The quote of the
month is by Jay Leno:
“With hurricanes, tornados, fires out of control,
mud slides, flooding, severe thunderstorms
tearing up the country from one end to another,
and with the threat of swine flu
and terrorist attacks.
Are we sure this is a good time
to take God out of the Pledge of Allegiance?’

For those that prefer to think that God is not watching over us.. …bye..

Hello Friends. Hope You’re Feeling Good!….cute image*

 

An elderly couple were killed in an accident and found themselves being given a tour of heaven by Saint Peter. “Here is your oceanside condo, over there are the tennis courts, swimming pool, and two golf courses. If you need any refreshments, just stop by any of the many bars located throughout the area.”"Heck, Gloria,” the old man hissed when Saint Peter walked off, “we could have been here ten years ago if you hadn’t heard about all that stupid oat bran, wheat germ, and low-fat diets!”

*****

A family of three tomatoes were walking downtown one day when the little baby tomato started lagging behind. The big father tomato walks back to the baby tomato, stomps on her, squashing her into a red paste, and says, “Ketchup!”

*****

A friend and I were standing in line at a fast-food restaurant, waiting to place our order.

There was a big sign posted. “No bills larger than $20 will be accepted.”

The woman in front of us, pointing to the sign, remarked, “Believe me, if I HAD a bill larger than $20, I wouldn’t be eating here.”

Have fun~

More laughs for you……

 Sticks & stones may break my bones, BUT chains & whips excite me!

 Autocorrect can kiss my ask..!!

 My wife’s jealousy is getting ridiculous. The other day she looked at my calendar and wanted to know who May was.

 The average power nap is 20 minutes. This works out well because I can fit 3 of them evenly into one hour.

 If you blink your eyes really fast, it looks like there are strobe lights in the room. I have been having random parties throughout the day!

 I love in horror movies how the person yells out “hello?!” as if the killer is gonna say “yeah I’m n the kitchen, want a sandwich?”

. When butterflies are in love, do they feel human’s in their stomach?

Still laughing?

Have a great weekend.

I am heading for the mountains.

See you soon.

Fly me away …….

I do not want to do that anymore
I need a break for a bit
Can you please just get out of my way
so I can fly on my magic carpet?

Where would I go you ask?
What would I do?
Whatever I want to do, I say
and wherever I want to go!

No, do not say it is not possible
Do not start with that negative tone
I think I will get going now
Just, please just leave me alone!

Off I go
My first stop Africa
My next will start with a B!

I shall be gone for awhile

as you can see!
Do not miss me, OK?
I will think of you with a smile
I will think of you everyday

Bye

for Charlie……..

Fun VIDEO for the WEEKEND celebrations*

This video is one that is sure to make you smile and sure to make you relate to your dating days. lol I hope you are all planning a weekend full of family time. Friends can make the days a lot happier also! What ever you plan to do…BELIEVE and life will not look so bad. I plan on having family over on Sunday for Easter. I am going to be cooking up spinach ravioli, veggies of some type, salad,, a fish dish, and a beef dish. A little bit for all to enjoy. My mom will surprise us with the dessert. My younger brother is surprising us with the yummy bread. I do believe I see more gym time in my future, lol

Believe in Yourself;

Luisa Doraz

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